Uncertain steps, face upraised to a storm swollen sky

There is a dance that rages through my bloodstream
Demanding steps be taken
Demanding music and light
Demanding quiet whispers and moans

It filters through my skin
Permeates every cell
Binding closer and close

Passion reminding us to live
To risk all
For each turn of the wheel
Each shift of night into day
Leaves behind bones stripped bare
All meaning carried along in pockets grown swollen

And still
Buried in the choices we’ve stuffed ourselves full on
Crappy breadsticks before the meal
The song calls

Discard the knives buried in flesh
The Flashfire and freeze
Remember but be light
And still brave the waters

And dance
Whole and broken
Joyous and bleakly
In grace and stumbles
But always
In my embrace

Ebullient voice, rise!

Flung away knowing uncertainty
Until harsh ground makes truth known
But instead of the crush of worlds ending
Dance free as a wind
Heart light rising up
Tethered by naught but these tenuous strands
Of possible impossibility
Arrayed like building blocks
I reach forth my hand
And set
The cornerstone
Let this time be joy
Shouted from lips long silent

Where my heads at

I don’t want to wallow in misery propped up by others feeling horrible. I want to wallow in joy, exhultant in love. I want to dance with Em, sing with K, hold A, kiss everyone. I want joy and laughter. I’m so tired of things not working out. Of things being so complicated, of distance and acting responsibly, deliberately. It gets old, gets tiresome. Sometimes, I just want to scream my want. Not that doing so does any good but fuck, sometimes, something has to give

Top 5 things I miss about being in a relationship

1. Having someone to talk to who is genuinely interested in what I think.

2. Listening to their thoughts, ideas, and opinions. I live so much in my head that hearing a different thought process is interesting and sexy.

3. Kissing. I could say sex, but I miss kissing more.

4. Reading something or hearing something and reminding myself to share that with them.

5. Waking up with them snuggled up against me and remembering that we chose each other.

Closets aren’t only for sexuality

If you are in pain
If you are hurting
You have within you the ability to make a choice
To break free and stand apart
To choose those who support your dreams
Who see your desires as beautiful
It is the hardest thing in the world to choose to be open, to choose to be free
This is the choice that defines our character
There are all kinds of secrets
Of things we hide from others, from ourselves
Assess the situation and decide, for your sanity, for your happiness, for your safety
Decide to step free from social constraints
Decide to be free

The fiercest flame

The thought of her skin
The softness of her as my hands run over her
The feel of the hairs on her arms
Running fingers lightly over, barely touching
The slap of leather to skin
The sound of her voice, whispering through my bones
Painfull moans
She kneels in first position, head bowed
I reach down, running hand along jawline
Tilt her lovely face to mine
“You are my very good girl”
Her smile, and her eyes, shining with pride
Her reply, “thank you, Sir”
My heart full to bursting,
Fierce pride, joy filling every inch
My submissive, my girl, my miss