Freedom of speech

Freedom of Speech protects you from the government or the law of the land. It means that your speech cannot be restricted by the government. The government cannot imprison, silence, or kill you for speaking.

It does not mean that speaking is without consequences. An employer, especially in a right to work state, can fire you for saying things. This is especially prevalent when your speech runs counter to what they think or if the opinion has a impact on their ability to do business.

Further, while you are exercising your free speech you should expect that others will be exercising theirs as well. Often in counterpoint to your own. Further, if your speech incites strong emotions in your heart, you can expect people to react in the same manner to you.

Freedom of speech does not protect you from your fellow citizens. It only means that if you say that the king or president or ceo or whatever is a fucking idiot, you cannot be subject to imprisonment or worse by the mechanistic cogs of the justice system. You will still be met with resistance from your fellow citizens.

You cannot hide behind freedom of speech and hope that people won’t Judge you or move against you. Speak all you want to but you will be opposed. And if any side chooses to escalate to violence then all involved parties are subject to the justice system. Just because you got clocked while you were exercising your right to speak does not mean that you get to retaliate. All are equally subject to the law. (in theory, in practice we see something else but that doesn’t make it right.)

That is all the logical and legalistic parts of me trying to reason with people.

The other parts are saying, if you stand with, condone, take the side of, or otherwise sympathize,  for any reason,  with fucking Nazis then you should be fucking clocked. You should lose business. You should be put on the horns of public scrutiny and your whole life turned upside down. You cast your lot in with them and you are accepting the consequences of your choice.

Welcome to what Freedom of speech really means.

The myth of the individual

I know people say you have to be enough on your own but I think that is western cultural bias. Specifically, USA culture. It says that you must stand on your own to be considered an adult. But the only people who truly do that are narcissists. And even they attempt to have people around, if only to fawn all over them.

We depend on each other and need human companionship. Even if the form that takes is casual comradery or the sharing of fandom. No one can be everything and attempting to do so frays our selves and our actual strengths go undeveloped as we attempt to swim up the tree.

Ultimately, I think, we attempt to stand on our own because we have been hurt by those we trusted. But who we trust is a product of standing on our own. Instead of looking for people who compliment who we are, we look for the similarities and homogeneous cultures and cliques do not thrive, instead infight and stagnate.

Perhaps it’s time to accept that we can’t stand alone and instead find our tribe. And treat it that way. As a group working together for the betterment of its members.

Top 3 things I will fuck up in a relationship

1. I’ll call it a relationship way before anyone considers it to be a relationship.
Then I’ll have to explain that I see all social interactions that are ongoing as relationships and then I’ll seem like a overthinking weirdo.

2. I will fall in love fairly quickly. And people will say that you barely know me, and I’ll say that’s true but I trust my Intuition and it says that there is something here. Love expands to fill the available space. It is not a finite thing to me. I’m not saying one true love or perfection or anything. I’m saying that I like, respect, enjoy your thoughts and mind and I feel something in you that calls to me. Again, weirdo.

3. I will fail to initiate physical intimacy, including as little as kissing until you are thinking Finally. Because I will not act without consent and I am steadfast in my rules(which I suppose is number 4). I don’t do the when the moment is right. I depend on my partner/date to tell me, Yes Now. Of course, I’m a passionate man so that may later seem to be a mistake. As in, I’ll want to kiss and touch and hold and hug all of the time, plus more intimate things as we progress. And believe me, I have no regard for public space. So PDA is very much on the market.

There are a bunch more but those are the ones that span across my experience.

Super power? 

I have many geek friends and I get asked the question, “If you could have a super power what would it be?” 

I usually say teleportation, because who wouldn’t want to be able to just go anywhere whenever. But, I was thinking and I think I want this one more, it’s nontraditional but then, so am I. 

I think I want to be able to see an aura around the people who are interested in being with me. Obviously, there would be fluctuations but when I reveal things that matter and you no longer are interested, at least then I’d know. And I’d be able to ask out people without first telling myself that they are going to say no, so in asking, you will have lost nothing. The calculus of being single.

A ponder

I would give much to have the people I love be in my arms. So I may take care of them as much as they take care of me. Because it is in the day to day that love can be said to live. And in the together is where love can truly flourish.

Be kind, be generous, be patient. Love for who they are not for who you desire them to be. There is nothing in this world as strong as love, there is nothing in this world as fragile.

Thoughts of a Sir on a Friday morning 

I find the most interesting thing. If I am engaging with a submissive I almost can’t help but assume a Sir role. I’m not doing it deliberately, it’s just that their need immediately changes my behavior. I could be depressed or sad and if they need, I immediately switch to the caregiver/Sir role. It’s like all the bullshit slips away and I’m left with the simple desire to make their world work again. And afterwards, whatever negative feelings I had are gone. Call it a need to be needed or just a slip into the role that feels most right. But if I think of things in those terms, if I’m approached in those terms, the certainty of my place in the world makes me and whomever I engage with, have a better experience.
Just where my thinking goes this morning.

A thought that pulls tears

I wonder sometimes if people get into relationships with me just to be loved for a moment in time. To know that, someone, somewhere will always love them.
I envy them the certainty. The bedrock truth. That if I love, I love forever. Though time, distance and even realities keep us apart.