Month: June 2018

Inexorable conclusion, perhaps

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Your hand on my arm
That simple touch
Means more than I can ever say
No hesitation

I hesitate
Wanting more
But stutter

Brush by you
Touch
I see him watching us

Circling each other
Wondering if maybe
Give in to passion

But there is a right way
And I need more than a few hours
With you

And I see him looking
His eyes like coals
Daggers into me
Do you see?

You belong to you
Keep his opinions to himself
I’ll not allow an insult

Slow steps
Make the dance
And perhaps a symphony

Or perhaps I hope for more than
More than can be given
But I know
Now

Not more than I deserve

Embrace as wounds close

Pelgris6 Comments

Slip below the waves
Warm water washes away
Hands reach out
Catching before slipping
Further into peace
Long minutes of silence
The hush of soft breathing
You stretch out
Reaching both away
And back to touch
Eyes open to find you missing
Not empty
As if the scent of your heart
Lingers in my mouth
Acceptance
And the fresh scent
Of dawn

Is this some weird form of insecurity?

Pelgris2 Comments

I think I may be bad at flirting
But not really bad but just because
I’m not flirting
Or I am but I’m not playing games
or something
I’m just talking and saying what I’m thinking
And what I’m thinking is that I see you
And in seeing you
I see something wonderful
And I say hey, this thing about you is really awesome
But I don’t follow up because I’m not flirting
Not to say not interested
Just not playing a game
I know that sounds like bullshit
Or like a game in and of itself
I’m just being sincere and people say kind or nice
And I am just like, ‘huh?’
Cause I’m just saying what I feel
Not trying for an outcome or to be seen
I’m a weirdo
I’m aware

Deeply held games that are no such thing

Pelgris2 Comments

There is pain in the things that are ignored
No rest for the unnoticed
Desires well fed by dreams
Forgotten upon waking
Always they come
Dreams and words
Wanting nothing more than that they stay
Instead dwindle
Grow distant
Declared you mine
You didn’t realize that outlined my obligations
Not yours
But I do wish
You’d say the same

No sleep mambo

Pelgris2 Comments

She consumes me
Heart on fire but no words
Say yes
Take you into my hands
Make you safe and unsafe
Dance hands across skin
Across throat
Air dwindles as euphoria spreads
I know she doesn’t want me
Her heart a danger
Can’t help how I feel
She doesn’t want to know
Again and again on this circus wheel
Making the same mistake
Only one ever wanted me
And I failed her
I don’t deserve anyone else

Nothing stops

Pelgris1 Comment

The fecund stink of fresh turndown earth
Sweet summer grass spouts green stalks
The soft bud peaks in the still gray of dawn
Fresh air and the slice of cold wind
Lost amidst the summer waves
Soft wind
Warmth of day grows
Heat builds
Secrets whisper
Bones ache with tired
Brain fills with lies that sound like truth
Sleep the only refuge from hopes blade
But still
The heat envelopes
The night closes in
Stars breathe life to darkness
And the moon
Rises

Night grows as summer begins to fade

Pelgris2 Comments

Say you are the light
But that’s not me
Instead I am the vast infinity of night
The darkness that envelops you from sight that makes it easier to sing at the top of your lungs
While driving somewhere you don’t want to be
The darkness that inspires you to car dance because for a few minutes you are free and alone enough to be yourself
Hiding you from sight of judgment
The night that stretches out its hand and holds you safe in its arms
And in the night we see worlds and stars that promise new worlds
New possibilities
New chances for things to work out
To be different
Nothing against the light but we gave up on each other a long time ago and summer
Much as I love your heat, your light and I broke up a long time ago
We keep in touch like friends from high school
Waving high as we pass by on Facebook
But me, I am at home in the night sky
And the cool dark of infinity
And the soft welcome light of the moon
I know it shines because the sun reflects off her surface but though she hides her face from us
She still chooses to share
And maybe that’s because she knows
The light obscures
Shows us this infinite blue
But night and darkness show the truth
I’ll take a truth over a warm spoken lie
And day of the weak
Night
I’m so happy we get more of you now.