Thunder crashes down
Herald of the torrent
Wash me away
As long as it’s to you
The agony of without
Tearing
Thread by thread
One more failed attempt
To get to you
One more broken footprint
Bruised
Aching
And resolute
Poems
Split screen reality
I see you in my minds eye
That knowing smile
The deep glimmer of pain and yearning
I see you
Knowing every inch of your heart
At least the surface
Longing to plunge deeper
To claim every millimeter
And in my exposure
Be claimed
As all that we are is laid bare
Hidden eyes waiting with a ready flinch
For the rejection of a misplaced word
Walls break the sound barrier as they clash into place
We stand
Opposite
Hands pressed deeply
Waiting for the wall to drop
Held up by the pressure of our longing
Whispered words shouted
I love you
Echoing out
The attempt to show
Not tell
All these hours away from you
All I have is my words
Hoping each tear shaped drop is enough
Hoping each action proves my constancy
Hoping in my bent back
Smiling lonely
Looking for the path that brings
Me to
Us
Gold patterns in porcelain bowls
Eyes burning with weariness
Heavy they close
A heart soars free
Painful aches flee
Looking for the warmth of you
A choice
Again and again
Building as a droplet in snow
Becomes the mountain
Becomes the inexorable
Unstoppable
In my love of you
Mine
My choice
A coloring book is not connect the dots
It’s hard to think beyond the next step
The next sleep
The next day
I’ve somehow lost those moments of space
Those silent minutes which roared and shook so loudly
Only time to spare a small smile at the croak of bird
To fawn all over a cat
Or wave like a maniac to a dog in the window
All just gestures of echoed love
Reflecting back to you
The night wears a heartbeat of silence
The only joys are those we seize for ourselves
Those bare moments where you describe your day to a person you love
That dream that haunts you
Of walking in a arboreal garden
And seeing your person’s face light up with your
Mere
Presence
A minute for yourself
Alone in the ache of love
And distance
The first perfect bite which explodes so flavorful and tempting
The words unspoken
The ones that pierce
A desperate frissioned ragged edge
Tears unshed
And a song that makes you dance
Life spinning and time fleeing
Too many obligations
Not enough you
Soft breathe which catches on waking
We are bent flower promises
Our light touches over skin
Hands soft but ridged in callouses
A legacy of past actions written in scar and stretch
Wrinkle and aches in joints
Broken bones which
Now healed still click
For all of this
Is our passion less for being out of focus
Beyond the lens of society
Or instead
Is passion which knows itself
The more powerful
We who survive and still find each other despite the wounds of the past
Still open ourselves
Vulnerable and exposed
Is our love less
For having been born from a distant song
Or instead
Is it strength to find a heart that’s bright and desirous
And in the knowing
We find beauty
And flame
And the circling of fingertips against skin
The brushing of lips against neck
The soft smile and the lascivious grin
And a hope
Born in the taste of her
Bent willow by the rushing water
Days spent in the quiet ache of waiting
Pressed lip consonants and soft wet vowels
Dull repetition needed to bring us together
The possible made real by the simple choice
Again and again
Of you
The days ticking by which promise some future yes
Lost in the drift
Of seconds ripping
On razor wings
Each moment an agonize
In which the only balm is the thought of you
Though through the haze of fogged up desire
Still
Quietly I bleed
Patters against the tile
Curling steam in a chill air
How dangerous the need
To have you by my side
I feel myself rushing to you
And wish
I could see you
Rushing to me
Anxiety scrambles for purchase
Sounds get stuck on my tongue
A few words waiting to be said
Waiting for some truth
As the stress mounts
Real sets in
Unsexiest of worries
About money reel and hopeful
What was can seldom be
Unless perfect storm and
Responsibility
All boats rise with prosperity
But so do they in calamity
And mindless ramblings for wars of desire combat against what’s possible
Until emergency depletes and scramble for purchase on dirt
Hard packed with indifference
Easy to live without the cost of living
Scramble for a place makes mock of all
Until only the memories stand sentinel
Around broken forms
Lifeless
After the fall
I am empty hallway just passing through
I am removed from what is real
A bound ghost inhabiting empty halls once filled with pain
Echoing fading laughter bounces against the dark deeply stained wood paneled walls
The glimpse of running and the slight thumps
Too quick out the corner of the eye
Heart threads faster
In the empty quiet
A stillness
Without you
Pawns of a waking dream
There was a time when I thought I could teach the world what it could be
Thought that shaping words and connecting thoughtss
Invoking emotions and making manifest not just desire but forming reality to will
Would somehow resonate and works its way beyond my borders
Would transform those it touched and somehow reshape a world dying
As days and years passed
I gave up on those thoughts that bloomed as a redolent flower which strutted and strived
Glitzy and hollow
Grip slowly relinquished as new life broke the mold of what was making me into what would be
And in the chrysalis of new beginning
A blow to the heart set me spinning away from one path as time and history rewrote itself
And I
At junction
At crux
Was cast out
Flotsam on the river of causality
Chrysalis hardens to shell
And denied outward growth
The only way out became down
Deep through pain and loathing
Into depression which had always nibbled at the edges
And now gloried in being centerpiece for a captive audience
Deeper
Core out each piece
And discern crystal or flaw
Raw and wriggling
Pink remora leaving behind fresh wounds but dying alone on the cold pavement
Each passing year a broken memory until tattered cataclysm in shredded throat torn again and again
feeling as blood and pressured release
Scream frequency finding harmonic resonance
In shell long past useful
And burst outward infecting
Killing what it touched
And still a bit remained
A blade sheathed beneath bone
A weapon of times long gone
Master no more and wielded wild-eyed
Agony as all walls fall and what was out caresses newly formed akin
Until pleasure and pain are just two ways of speaking and both hold no discernable sway over the other
Instead, both in their firmament
Gods bestride a world of flesh
And I mistress and master
Betrayed broken and each broken rib pierced breath
Imperceptibly easier
Until anew
A person looks out
Wondering at a world they didn’t live through
A time traveler taking the longest route through blindness to arrive in a fight that cannot be one
With coping skills that say to take a simple action
One that heart and eyes know will be unforgivable but effective
Begging anyone willing to give permission for the monster inside
Blade buried in bone
To be let free
Afraid to be allowed to be
And watching as it all burns
Silence let’s go its grip
A wave forms seeking cross and disruption
Seeking amplitude match
And growth
Seeking
Voice to voice
Until all of us
Throats raw and bleeding
In notes crystalline from cores of reflected shatters
Speak
Sleepers
Wake!
