I’m that day to day love
That wake you up with a kiss and coffee love
That small things love
That singing songs made up on the spot love
That kiss the palm of your hand love
That working love
That note written in you pocket love
That gives you hope and goosebumps love
That long slow kisses love
That taking care of you fully aware you are strong enough to take care of yourself love
That willing to wait love
That soft gasp half heard over the phone love
That sleeping alone in his bed love
That hopeful broken love
That life spelled out in words love
That missing you love
loneliness
Sitting alone on the crumbling riverbank
Arch of Firmament
Storm clouds race the horizon
Bellwether Silence
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The texture of tongue on teeth
From memories
Rise as leviathan
Woken from fever
A blade bared and hungry
Quiets into painful lethargy
Silence grows
Though distance is constant
Roads least traveled feel less
Was once sorry
Torn between decisions
Time passes
Lament for what may have
Falls silent
What is
Sings a sirens song
And what may be
Drips from lips stained red
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Embrace me as a flower growing by starlight
Soft petals turned razor sharp
Soft sadness at wounds too small to ever heal
Scarred by healing
Marks littering my body
Closed and hiding in daylight
A thing of thorns and pain
I grow full by starlight
Cloaked in the night
Scars hidden and covered
By the frozen expanse
Blooms shiver in the this never-ending
While I awake anew
We share a world but we’re not in the same one
Mine has dangers sharp as blades
Lies as comfortable as clouds
Truths as broken as glass
Plant yourself close
I will grow
And protect you shelter you
the broken rose of the winter night
A field of unknown stars
An ocean of pain and beauty
Beneath a frozen moon
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Rough woods yields form
So easy to lose in silence
Hollow silence where not even the echo of hearts beating faintly thrums
Distant words waiting for unsaid truths
Always hesitant
What point truth which digs dagger deep
Which burns a familiar cold
Almost like home
Like tired lines which snap shape
Which make you feel like control is there
Woefully unprepared for love
Without presence
Light bleeds blue
Too slow to see
Bleed violet
Who gets to see the space between
Where pain is just what is
And hope is just words written on leaves
And tossed out
Answers looking for questions
Homes looking for love
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Split screen reality
I see you in my minds eye
That knowing smile
The deep glimmer of pain and yearning
I see you
Knowing every inch of your heart
At least the surface
Longing to plunge deeper
To claim every millimeter
And in my exposure
Be claimed
As all that we are is laid bare
Hidden eyes waiting with a ready flinch
For the rejection of a misplaced word
Walls break the sound barrier as they clash into place
We stand
Opposite
Hands pressed deeply
Waiting for the wall to drop
Held up by the pressure of our longing
Whispered words shouted
I love you
Echoing out
The attempt to show
Not tell
All these hours away from you
All I have is my words
Hoping each tear shaped drop is enough
Hoping each action proves my constancy
Hoping in my bent back
Smiling lonely
Looking for the path that brings
Me to
Us
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Long slow fall to the cold stare of the middle distance
These long hours of silence
Of hearing white noise hearts and swift blood
Attenuation
Feeling cotton abrasion from old cloth pressed down against skin
The soft of new starched straight yet pliable
These textured off white walls and bed splashed crimson hoping to wake in core some semblance of joy
But the quiet stretches out
And too tired soul
Weary from fighting for smiles and hopes
Falls to knees
Beaten without solace
The shiver as hair raises against skin pushing out
Adrenaline wanting nothing more than a few minutes until exhaustion leads its way through collapse
The beckoning oblivion of sleep
To dream of lives unlived
To be for those few minutes happy
An edifice collapsing under the weight of its needs
Too much for any person to sustain
That subtle lack of home
While house stands
Places feel so empty
Without
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A hopeless hope is worse than nothing
I am tendrils questing out
reaching for connection
straining to directions
which once were home
just a hothouse bloom
slowly slipping into quiet
a last goodbye
a last hurrah
before the final cull
I am tendrils reaching out
And finding only
Silence
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Waking up in purgatory
A ten by ten room
made of blood and bone
sinew taut and running rone
languid thought and slashing blade
hurricane disaster
a grip on the horizon
and the last drop of whisky
hard to loose oblivion
drunk on pleasure and serotonin withdrawal
awaking nightmare
found without rudder
without sail
adrift
welcoming the last storm
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Trace of limits
To ascend as if a bird
foundering foundation falls away
only scant skin separates faith from fall
Drought as diamond
base desire wars with ascent
Solitude in flight
destination unknown
nazca lines embroider
faint markings
of a dwindling civilization
A filter on the self
Dwindling down to these few grains
Lost in the pleasure of being
Hold in arms grown weary
One last choice
Last chance
Pelgris 