Paul and Storm are nerd/geek hilarious singer songwriters; I was at this concert. Wish the would come back to Pax Prime(West). I’m remembering this concert and it was the first time I had felt good in 5 years. It was this night that I started to wake up from the deep depression I was in. So thank you Paul and Storm. Thank you for waking me up.
Month: July 2016
Song for the Day
You’ve dominated my heart, Goddess of my Heart.
My always
I tell my loves and lovers always. That I will always be honest. Always be faithful. Always be there. Always keep their desires in mind. Always listen, if not understand. Always support their choices, provided those choices hurt none. Always love them. Always, always, always.
Its true and not true. I will always. Unless you walk away, no longer want me. In that circumstance, my always drifts away like a dream apparating into consciousness. Leaving me with the only always you can be certain of. I will always love you. Love is not finite. It grows to encompass all.
I feel it needs to be said, that the person I am with now. The person I love now. She is different from all prior loves. In most I am holding some piece of myself back. Some bit I don’t feel safe to share. With my Goddess of my Heart, she could have all of me. Everything I am. Life doesn’t wait for it to be simple or easy. I’ve learned that. And when it seems easy, it becomes difficult almost out of spite. We can overcome it. I’ve made my choice. I make it again and again. My choice is you. Again and again.
Isolation
What builds and breaks
what fears do shake
and in the hollow shift
the blanket moans and rote cries
sleeping soundly with our lies
this nightmare begins as I wake
sorrow pouring in
finger tremble length from the trigger
depression strides and struts it’s stuff on stage
growing larger in the silence of spilling tears
banked memories rekindle flames
dark journeys play out
crippling self doubt
need to touch, to feel, to know
but only the pain crashes down
smothering hope’s reaching hand
Sheet music
I will dream of you
when sleep pulls me under
and with every inhaled breathe
the thought of you pulls me forward into the unknown future
if I must
I will be as a dream stealing moments with you when your mind slumbers
as our hearts are drawn to each other
and live lives in that world we create for each other
but this dream
these words can not long contain us
we will burst forth.
You are the ember in my heart.
My home. My refuge.
If we be but dream, dreams fade.
But
NO
we are as souls bound together
as rhythm and melody in a song the world itself sings
You are my song.
My Cha’trez.
And I will sing you forever.
I’m still broken, just in different ways
Is it bad that I don’t expect those that I love to love me back? That the mere thought, “who could love the monster I am” can bring me to tears instantly? Because of all the beautiful things I believe, it is this one dark seed that sits in my heart. This is the last piece of heartache I work on. I say this now because it scares me to say it. How can this part of me, this broken self be revealed and still be worth loving. He writes through the tears. But it’s a rule. If I betray my own rules, how can I be trusted to not do so again.
Just hopes
I want to sing you songs.
I want to read you stories.
I want to write poetry in tracery across your skin.
I want to slow dance with you to the sounds of a thunderstorm.
Lost velvet kiss
Wood moans wind,
brittle amber of falls remembering,
dances then swept silent,
bright moon slips past slumber
past the hungering earth
soft crunch burns the shouting quiet
till round tension drop
and wind sorrow sings
How do rules affect your mindset?
I had some things to say on this and emdimensional is a fun and interesting blogger
Syllogistic decline
Should heart be cast down
to erupt unaided by time or awareness
bound purpose in the snow
failing inward to oblivion
and splintered remnants of knowing smiles
found distressed in the slippery madness
gone hallow
desperate to desire
in turnabout and gyre
taste of lips and I am home
the maelstrom’s son forgotten
pressure builds of slipping shudder step
and giving all
have wrought
The pale memories of waning years bundle
spear out
the piercing shriek of pulsar
what was once the history of the world
becomes the collapsing waveform
the energistic creation of itself
modified by the shifting passage of existence
