Why are there songs of the day?

Music doesn’t make me remember where I was when I first heard the song. None which makes me feel nostalgic. None that transports me to another time.
Instead, it just makes me feel. Like it opens the locks on long closed doors. And a flood of emotions bears down.

If I want to feel light, then Armin Van Buuren will make me dance in joy. A-Ha’s Take On Me is instant tears and a deep ache in my heart. There is music that makes me feel like running away and music that makes me ready to fight. Music that gives me hope and music that evokes a sense of dark ownership.

In my head, there is always music, whether it be some line or some tune, its always present. Silence is rare and in silence, I will find some new piece and add it to my hearts collection. I don’t allow myself to be mired in the familiar and always seek out the new. Because music is who we are. And allowing ourselves to stagnate, or crystallize, is the path which leads to stagnant thought. To zero change with no ideas making it past what you ‘know’ to be true.

Music is the wedge through which I keep doors open. The battering ram of new ways of thinking. It is everything made beautiful. And I have never felt alone when the music swells.

Rhapsody in minor

One note rings out crystal and clear
Whole histories and promises in it
Tumult and peace
Beauty and destructive renewal

All shattered by a rush to explain
What was said and what was meant
Attempts to see clear
Self deprecations
Attempting to make light of heavy feelings
Saying like when love is meant
But people don’t know what love is but they know they like the taste
Easier to compare to like and hold out heart for love
And this rush of explanations and words, words, words

And the note
Fading in the still dawn air
Sings it’s melancholy

Select: Shuffle

My playlist sings of loss
Pull up favorites
Spin the wheel
Shuffled steps
Head down
Musical augery
Dance in hopes dashed reverie
Shuffle foretells misery
Like it reads my heart
Empty suffused darkness
Distilled in smoke stained notes
Each record clicks in place
Bones rolled
In modern sacrifice
Mired in the present
Like a maze with no exit
Just beginnings
And blood drenched wrong turns
Dead ends decorated by bones

Emerge the dancer

Soft notes
Looking across the room
Into your eyes
Shocked recognition thrills up spine
Sad note of missed opportunities
Wistful reaching
Across the dance floor
Beat pulls us closer
Through the dancers
Their wild gyre
Obscuring the sight of you
Each re-emergence sending
Lightning through my heart
Step, step, step
Measured movements
Face to face
Hands clasp and on hip
Sway and burn into your eyes
Move together
Actions blurring in the fury of our passion
Past burned away
Until only now
And us

Sheet music

I will dream of you
when sleep pulls me under
and with every inhaled breathe
the thought of you pulls me forward into the unknown future
if I must
I will be as a dream stealing moments with you when your mind slumbers
as our hearts are drawn to each other
and live lives in that world we create for each other
but this dream
these words can not long contain us
we will burst forth.

You are the ember in my heart.
My home. My refuge.
If we be but dream, dreams fade.
we are as souls bound together
as rhythm and melody in a song the world itself sings
You are my song.
My Cha’trez.
And I will sing you forever.

Too many zooz


The first notes I heard, that hard blat then pause, then blat, percussion, then escalation¬† into the meat of the music but those few sparse sounds at the beginning stay and echo through your blood. They get into your bones and make you move. The structure is there, reminiscent of samba or cumbia, but elevated with an energy that says listen we’re saying something important. It moves like a living sound inhabiting your headspace. A living breathing organism. If I compared it to modern music, I’d say early Fishbone but with a better more visceral sound. It’s layered and complicated with enough simplicity to tie it together. It doesn’t dumb itself down and it appeals to millions. The performance is great, riveting. The music itself sounds like the very best of Coltrane. If they can maintain that raw authenticity they will be remembered forever.