The solubility of tears

I bear an unfortunate truth. Namely that I cannot forget people or places. Things I’ve read or watched but not physically experienced are harder to retain.
But people and place and and what I was feeling at those intersections, they are always with me. For good or for ill. I envy people who can walk away. Who can put people in the rear view and mostly not look back. Or let go.

I can only work through the situation. Examining all the angles, understanding my place in events and relationships. And still left to wonder, because the picture is never complete. I can never see their side.

So while I can keep going forward. Because there is no other real choice. I can never forget. And those I’ve declared mine. Those I’ve said are my person. I can never forget. Nor leave behind, if it is in my power and is not against their interest to do so.

But still, the memories pile up, some I shoulder alone and others I have help carrying. But all are there, indelible and immutable.

Memories…the burden no one thinks is one

On the drive in-Audio-Sleep

Struggle to wake

Summer morning into mourning
In twisting and yearning
Struggle to present the smallest of faces
To keep from knocking on your door
Your passionless castle
A cane to my back
As I hopelessly fall
I scrabble against high walls
Clinging in hope
This shadow is burning
Soon there’ll be no place to hide
Only yearning but falling apart