This patient ending
pull hooks knitting designs
made from bone
thirst building
heart punctured
bleeding out
connections fade
replaced by cold ache
simple desire for lips eager for my touch
capillary pulse
chorus make me whole
slow march
made penitent
shifting demands
a lost seashell
picked and discarded
Month: June 2017
Song of the Day
Am I high maintenance?
I am tough to be in a romantic relationship with, I think. If I know where I stand, have affection from my partner, and we have communication every day then I’m OK. Probably even good. On some days great.
But if I don’t know where I stand, then I’m always seeking information to get to that information. Which means weird questions and anxiety.
If we don’t communicate every day for more than a single exchange, I begin to accrue anxiety and eventually spiral into a full blown spinout and possible depression.
Cold language or cold treatment can seem to be lack of affection. And it almost always means there is a problem. Maybe not with the relationship but with life or whatever.
This leads me to believe that I am not trusted. And cue eventual anxiety and depression.
I feel like this makes me high maintenance. Or be perceived as high maintenance.
Anxiety and depression reactions are not ideal consequences but they are things that can be alleviated by my partner just being there. In that state I don’t need solutions, I just need presence.
Those things seem like things things anyone would want?
Am I asking for too much?
Those seem like normal things to want.
Seeing you across a room
This fade
this falter
this slip
Drink wild
drink deep
drink death
Hope beats
hope cries
hope sleeps
Wake dreams
wake needs
wake scenes
Let dance
let kiss
let linger
Turn away
turn away
Cut strings
