I am tough to be in a romantic relationship with, I think. If I know where I stand, have affection from my partner, and we have communication every day then I’m OK. Probably even good. On some days great.
But if I don’t know where I stand, then I’m always seeking information to get to that information. Which means weird questions and anxiety.
If we don’t communicate every day for more than a single exchange, I begin to accrue anxiety and eventually spiral into a full blown spinout and possible depression.
Cold language or cold treatment can seem to be lack of affection. And it almost always means there is a problem. Maybe not with the relationship but with life or whatever.
This leads me to believe that I am not trusted. And cue eventual anxiety and depression.
I feel like this makes me high maintenance. Or be perceived as high maintenance.
Anxiety and depression reactions are not ideal consequences but they are things that can be alleviated by my partner just being there. In that state I don’t need solutions, I just need presence.
Those things seem like things things anyone would want?
Am I asking for too much?
Those seem like normal things to want.