Fun fact about me: I was going to another room to read my book and I went to plug my phone in for charging. I wasn’t going to use it, I was going to read. But then I thought, “But what if I get a idea, how will I write it down?” So, here I am writing down a little story about needing to be able to write things down instead of reading my book. #writerslife
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The problem with hunger is that it never really goes away. We can suppress it or turn it to other things but that taste of the thing you desire is never fully satisfied. Only when satiated is it quiet. My inner Dominant sleeps. Unquiet. Distractions abound. Work, computer games, phone games, great conversations, writing, poetry, exercise. But it’s like feeding a ravenous wolf table scraps, only by shear will is it controlled, and that control is slipping. My wolf plays closer and closer to the surface and soon I will bite as soon as soothe or worse turn the beast inward. I need a person to bend for me, bow to me, call me Sir and mean it, and most importantly, stay. Life and the wheel turns. And the consequence to not being crippled by sadness is that I am awake and seeking and the wolf inside drowses lighter and lighter. If I were better at starting relationships I’d go to local munches but I hold back looking for…someone, something more than a connection by lifestyle. Instead, a connection for life and lifestyle. I could no more have one without the other. The wolf will awake. It will happen. Best to have a safe outlet when it does.