Reaching for the light but ending up with shadows

I don’t think it’s truly set in that she is no longer mine, If she ever was. That she doesn’t want me, if she ever did. I would have done anything to be with her. All she needed to do was ask. I suppose I keep looking.

But for now I need to deal with this sadness. Of what might have been. Of what we are/were. And the fact I’m having trouble letting her go. More than that, that I don’t care how much it hurts me, that I still want her. But we all make our choices and, {my foolish heart demands I say this} at least for now, she has made hers.