I have become agitated, chafing at the restrictions of my world. The knowledge that you are out there and not in my arms. That I won’t feel your lips at the end of my day. That we won’t be going for a walk. That we won’t dance to a tune we hum. And all the other things we’ve talked of. It’s hard, it’s difficult but I’m starting to see that without your voice, your smile, the touch of your hands each day. Each day will get harder. I need you in my life, all the way in, right to the heart of me.