Starting to spin

Sometimes I want to do nothing but monopolize someone’s time. I don’t have anything to say really or event to go to or anything. I just want all of them, as much as I can handle and then a little bit more.

That makes me feel like a burden. Like, what the fuck? Where do I get off taking up all their time? They have a life, they have things to do. Moreover they probably don’t feel the same, but I won’t say anything. Because I feel like I don’t deserve it. And I’m a little afraid that they will shut me down.
Even more that they won’t but it’ll just be the once and I can’t stomach just one time when I feel like this.

I don’t know. I’d like to blame it on my 3 hours of sleep but I know that just sharpens the edges. It doesn’t make me feel anything that I wouldn’t normally feel.