The pains are growing deeper
Grinding in
Driving down
A miracle trapped in breathing
Tongue growing heavy
Sinuous twisting shadow
Birthing exhausted light
Soft touch, soft words
Vanilla floral
Memories trapped in dreaming
The pains are growing deeper
Grinding in
Driving down
A miracle trapped in breathing
Tongue growing heavy
Sinuous twisting shadow
Birthing exhausted light
Soft touch, soft words
Vanilla floral
Memories trapped in dreaming
Itlxc
Doshlu
Af iutl
Coum beaae
Bo chael ifataal
Aedtrol
Doasai
the world is full
of tastes
of smells
of sounds
of touch
of gravitic waves
and more senses and more
to deny ourselves sensations
to deny ourselves the painful beauty
out of moderation or some shyness that such action will make us seem less
not to me I say, not to me
revel in life, if you desire it, take a piece of it;
anything else is blasphemy
it makes profane that which is holy
this world may be all we have
live it
I don’t have anything to say today, Not really. Just a rehash of lonely. Maybe the problem is I’m waiting for them to choose me as I choose them. It’s the same song, the same verse, the same lines. All stretching out before me in infinite lines. How do I make a decision if I’m not sure it’s the right one? There is no right decision most of the time. No perfect choice, no perfect path. Life just is, there’s no secret. Make the decision that makes you happy. I choose who I spend time with. I choose carefully and I choose well, I think. And if I’m more lonely, more bereft of hope afterwards, then that’s on me. Some pains are worth enduring. Some flames are worth the burns.
From behind cold glass
Nature inspires
The turning leaf, the calming wind
Confined, constrained by the city
It’s wild amidst order
The false impression
But freed of the city it bursts forth
Animal and unknown
Night without the city lights
The hum, sturm and drang
Civilization
Off the edge of the map
The subtle cut of living without a net
But then night falls
And all else sleeps
The panic sets in
Get out, Get Out, GET OUT
The cold slips in
Stealing sleep
Darkness and boredom awake
Waiting for dawn
And release.
Pains accumulate
Like scars on the heart
Each rip, each tear
Each razor thin cut
Self inflicted
Or arrows from within the comfort zone
Just past bearing
Growing louder in the quiet
Soft whispers too cruel to hear
But they lodge like flint
Brittle they break
Fragments working deeper
Note: There was a version of this that was joyous. Sometimes the shadows in the heart, they never go away
Consumed by the silence
Giving way to quiescent heart
Slow beating,
faltering
failing
drowning
Wake me with your dreams
Heart beats louder faster
Roaring
WAKE ME
stir up my blood
Let passion guide
Let honor temper
Let honesty…
All is dust and lies
I whisper the words of prayer
To the setting sun,
Joyous that it departs the sky
Night is falling
And I am undone
Unraveling out to the edges
A thousand thousand strands
Pressing against the borders of the flesh
Pressure building until I explode
Expanding out to the infinite stars
I connect to it all
The vastness of space wraps me up
Warmth against the cooling earth
Each being living, feeling
Slow shudder in birth and spinning down
Cells dying and burning in rebirth
Each moment
Each minute
Each second until time is lost
The clarity
The cresting of apogee
The melancholy the moment before the fall
Frigid notes, pouring down
Caress of sun through dying trees
Sight less eyes
Drifting beneath a lie both
Sonorous and alluring
Forgotten, grounded in summer mourning
Amid willow and boughs
songs whistling through dead trees
the lies we tell take root
and deep into us they flourish
they bloom and become real
battered
broken
drifting in dreams too often spoken
what i’ve become
what I’ll never be again
but still I cannot forget
what i was, when the journey began