Give me an enemy, someone to fight, but don’t give me this emptiness

Every word read cuts like a knife through flesh made tender by the pounding of fists
Glances through doorways during meetings sends the mind tailspinning through all the possibilities of what they are saying about me
And I know that these words weren’t written about me…probably
And I know that those glances are an attempt at distraction during a boring meeting…most likely
But feeling isn’t logic and pain doesn’t care why
It Wraps its chains and drags one down making each step harder
Until sleep is both the enemy and the only retreat
Until longing for arms to hold me gives me pause and exhaustion forces its way in and into cold plunges of water which mask the symptoms
“You’re looking better…”
For now, for now but sleep is the liar
And too much breaks the will as easily as too little
And blood on the water has the sharks circling

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