The best solution I’ve found is to fall truly madly deeply in love and work it out from there. This is not to say that you won’t suffer for it, just that it is the best thing. Caution is a slow death. Better to leap and know than to take step by cautious step and be undone.
For me it’s the other way around. I leap, and splat, or leap and it’s slow torture to disengage. The one time I was required (by my Dominant) to go slow, not only was it exquisite agony, but it led to the deepest, realest connection I have ever had to this point.
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If it was guided, that’s different I would think. But I fall pretty quickly even when I fight it. Basically, if I fight it, at some point they will say or do something and it will click, I love them. From there any holding back is agony. Not the good kind, mine leads to anxiety.
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